Things people say (1)

For years Hawk has had a sticker on his top box: ‘I slow down for horses.’ The Hobbit’s top box came with a sticker I didn’t like much, so I put on a different one, also on the theme of slowing down for horses.

He of Two Girlfriends owes me money. I’m pretending to be hard up to motivate him, so haven’t told him I’ve bought The Hobbit. I needed to call on him on a rainy day, but Hawk doesn’t like getting wet in his old age, so I had to ride The Hobbit.

‘What excuse am I going to make?’ I wondered. ‘He’s always been unobservant, but he’s used to me riding a red bike with a white top box and I’m going to show up on a grey bike with a blue top box.’ However he said nothing, so I stopped worrying. Finally I came to go, and he watched me put my bag in the top box and prepare to start The Hobbit. For several minutes he stared in silence at the little grey bike with the blue top box. Finally he spoke.

‘You’ve got a new sticker on your bike!’